That is exactly how I feel right now...
Just this past Sunday morning I clicked the submit button on my mission papers. I always kinda thought I would stay here in Provo for a little while longer. My business is going great, I love my job, and I feel like all my hard work is finally starting to pay off. Now, I leave it? Logically, I was telling myself, look at all the career offers you have been getting, take it and relish the success. But, in my heart, taking that road just didn't feel right.
Many of you had no idea that I was even considering a mission as an option, and neither did I frankly. It wasn't until a couple months ago that I really started to toy with the idea. I had been thinking seriously about going to med school, which is great right? I thought so. I felt like I had all the right qualities, and it had always been a dream of mine to at least apply. I started looking at the pre-reqs so I could plan on taking the MCAT.
All my life, what I remember the most about my character is that I wanted to help people, to teach people, cure people, do anything I could to make people happy. Then, I was reading a talk from one of the past GC talks, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. This whole time I kept saying that I wanted to help people, but when people asked me about serving a mission, I would say it wasn't for me. But serving a mission is a time in my life where I could help people and focus solely on teaching the Good News. Out of everything on this earth, in this time, this is the most important thing ever! The Gospel of Jesus Christ is a Plan of Happiness.
I put my availability date as the end of November. And I will be moving back to my parent's house in California in two weeks! I told a couple of my students just now about leaving, and they started to cry, their parents started to cry. I thought I had prepared myself emotionally to leave, but I guess I didn't do it very well, because my own tears mixed with theirs as we embraced in friendship. I knew all along that I was very attached to my students and their families, but again it hit me that this is the biggest sacrifice I could give. I am literally giving up my lively-hood, my life to serve our Lord.
I just realized that I think I need to do this so I can move on with my life. I became comfortable, and I knew that I wasn't progressing anymore. I felt stagnate for a while now. I am excited for this new step I am taking. This will be the hardest thing I had to decide in all of my almost 24 years. I know that this is the true church of Christ and I am eager to share with the people of the world my love for them and the love that our Heavenly Father has for them. We are his children and he knows us personally.
Love you all much!
7 comments:
Hey sister! Love you! A mission is a WONDERFUL wonderful thing. I wish I could wear that black name tag EVERYDAY! I know thou hast a strong testimpony and serving a mission will increase your knowledge and testimony 100 fold. Love you! Keep us updated!
I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU! I can not wait to hear where your mission will take you. Best of luck!
How wonderful Alicia! You will make such a wonderful missionary and do so much good wherever you go.
Good for you!! I am excited to hear where your call is! You will make an EXCELLENT missionary!!
Thank you everyone for the support, this has been very hard for me. I too am excited to know where my initial call is to be...Japan? Ukraine? France? There are so many possibilities.
Yay for missions!!! I tried calling you just a few minutes ago and left a really lame message, but I'm so excited for you. I totally understand how it feels to leave your students . . . I still miss them terribly!!! Love you! Call me some time!
Alicia I think that is awesome! I remember talking about this with you...you are going to be an amazing missionary! You will be so blessed. Keep in touch. Oh and I have no idea why you can't get my name on the side of your blog...I don't know how to do it on my blog at all.
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